Flounder and Flabbergast
by pammazola
Summary: Levi has been keeping a secret from the members of his squad. It's embarrassing, really. They believed he was perfect at everything. In this case, not so much. Rated T for Levi's crude language. Rivetra shipping.


**Disclaimer: I do not own Shingeki no Kyojin.**

**A request from tumblr. Please enjoy! Rated T for crude language.**

**~oOo~**

_**Flounder and Flabbergast**_

**~oOo~**

No one could ever hope to match Levi's speed and agility in the air. It was almost as if he were born to fly.

He was a remarkably short man, a light-weight, but toned in all the right places. His skill with the 3DMG excelled with every expedition he embarked. He made the task appear practically effortless, never a fault in his careful precision, somehow knowing the exact angle to shift with the wires, to take the sharpest turns and rebound off of any surface whilst maintaining a perfect form. Indeed, he was enviable. Many of the taller, heavier soldiers could not keep up, often clumsy in their haste to stay at his heels. Levi was truly admirable, at least, the members of his squad believed that to be the case. Whether it is 3DMG, swordsmanship, horsemanship, and – of course – cleaning, he seemed to cover all areas considerably well. The talents of humanity's greatest soldier knew no bounds.

Apparently.

This expedition was different. For once, Levi encountered a formidable obstacle that would not be so easily in conquering.

After several hours of ridding, fatigue began to take its toll, on both men and animals. At the sun's highest peak on a summer's day the heat can become unbearable. Sweat ran profusely off their foreheads, leaking into their eyes, obstructing vision and adverting attention. Still, they trudged on, weak, but vigilant.

An excited murmur rippled through the crowd. "Water… oh, God, there's water!" More shouts, louder, broken with relief. They knew Erwin not to be a fool. The commander had steered them off their course just ever so slightly to the lake that sat geographically north of Wall Rose. It was a necessary detour. The horses needed the time to be watered down and recoup their strength for the final leg of their journey. In addition, the mass of water was ideally sheltered by a surrounding area of forest lest Titans make an appearance. Erwin signaled the scouts to fan the perimeter, urging wariness.

There was still a man-made pier intact, what once must have been a popular fishing attraction. The horses were led down the shallow banks, and the soldiers eagerly indulged, quenching their thirst.

Petra Ral sat off one end of the pier and dipped her ladle, bringing the refreshingly cool liquid to her parched lips, sipping delicately for a moment. She sighed, allowing her shoulders to slump forward momentarily in exhaustion. Just out of the corner of her eye she caught sight of the second-in-command approaching, the heels of his boots clanking rhythmically across the wooden planks.

Immediately she brightened. "Levi-heichou, would you like to use mine?" Petra offered him the ladle and a smile that he did not return.

He glanced between her gentle hazel gaze and the metal spoon in her hands before shaking his head. "I'm fine."

Petra's eyes filled with concern. "I know you're brave, but please…?"

"_It's dirty_." His tone was relentlessly cold, despite feeling a small part of himself soften when he saw the worried crease of her brow. It was an attractive defining feature, he always thought.

"Ah, I see," she giggled, something that was a rarity on an expedition, and pressed the back of her hand to her lips in an attempt to stifle it. "Of course."

At that he contemplated inquiring the copper-haired woman about what she found so damn funny. His train of thought quickly derailed as an enormous wave of the despised lake water splashed dangerously close to the two of them. _"The hell...?_" An agitated Levi instinctively stepped backwards. He had nearly been drenched.

"Hey, Heichou! Petra! Come on in, it's fantastic!" Levi blinked incomprehensively. There were three shirtless figures that he recognized to be Auruo, Gunther, and Erd streaking through the smooth, glass-like calm of the lake, starting up a riot and bellowing with laughter. They dove beneath the surface for several seconds before reemerging, flipping their hair wildly, embracing the moment. The men gestured fervently for their comrades to join in.

"It's fine, Petra!" they reassured. "Outside the walls you're a soldier, not a woman! Just take it off!"

"_Are you morons insane?!"_ Levi growled deeply through his teeth, utterly aghast. "There's no time to be fucking around! _This isn't your backyard kiddy pool!_ Are you even listening to…? Huh? Ral, what are you…?" His grey eyes grew uncharacteristically wide and glossy. The ever-obedient Petra then stood beside him in nothing but her tight white pants and breast-bindings. Her 3DMG had already been tossed aside with her uniform, and she was hurriedly undoing the laces of her boots. The tops of her breasts strained against their concealing fabric, very favorably for the angle Levi was looking down upon her. Suddenly his throat constricted, depleting his lungs of oxygen, mind going numbingly blank for several long moments.

It wasn't until someone else wolf-whistled did he realize he was not the only one staring at her with his mouth partially agape. "Petra, don't…"

"Then catch me, Heichou!" she laughed, spinning lightly on her feet, arms flailing, permitting gravity to take control and pull her backwards off the pier. Levi made to take her hand, but hesitated. She was too far over, and he'd definitely end up falling in fully clothed after her. He grimly watched the lake engulf Petra, recoiling with undisguised distaste when he was splashed. _Sweet mother of fucking Maria_.

He really tried to look at her as a wet, formless thing, not really succeeding, but no one could really see the red stain on his cheeks anyway. Petra reemerged gracefully and began to tread water. She glanced up to her captain, expecting a harsh scolding and feeling a little ridiculous to have thought he would catch her body close to his and fall together. His eyes had reverted back to their usual narrow, half-lidded gaze. It might have been her imagination, but maybe his jaw was clenched, withholding an emotion that was just beneath his cynical pretense.

"What's wrong, Heichou? Don't you like water?" Erd called out, flawlessly executing a series of backstrokes. "I think you'd find it refreshing."

Levi scoffed; tearing his eyes away from the dark circles that showed faintly through the white bindings on Petra's chest. He felt the uncontrollable need to throw something on top of her, a towel… his cloak… _anything…_

Auruo noticed that the captain's left leg twitch awkwardly. He tilted his head in puzzlement, studying the short raven-haired man he respected above all else stand there, visibly conflicted. Suddenly it dawned on him.

"Heichou, do you know how to swim?" He could not keep the amusement from filtering through what was supposed to be an innocent question. Erd chortled, though, and now Petra was biting her bottom lip, looking up at him expectantly.

Levi felt his face flush with heat again; shooting his subordinate the most withering glare he could muster. "Shut up, you floating piece of shit. When a Titan comes fishing for food, I'll have no sympathy."

He meant to make a flashy exit then by turning on his heel with the cloak billowing out behind him. But no. He was anything but graceful as he misjudged the first step, taking it too sharply, slipping on puddles of water, stumbling over the other boot, and then there were weird, flapping arms, as if he could elevate before tipping over and falling face first into the lake.

The rest of his squad floundered about; each making a frantic dive for Levi's sinking form.

"Oh my God, is he okay? Heichou? Heichou!" Gunther firmly gripped the captain from under his arms, and the others helped lug his body back onto the pier. Petra quickly crawled up after them, weighed down by her wet pants, taking his face in her hands, stroking back his hair and pulling him close. "He needs mouth to mouth, stat!"

Auruo forcefully pulled her hands away. "I've done this kind of thing before! Turn his head sideways to drain water out the ear. Alright, head back to center. Here goes nothing." Auruo pinched Levi's nose, took a deep breath and bent his face down to meet his.

Unfortunately, or fortunately, he never came closer than a few centimeters. Because within a span of seconds after Petra was ripped away from him, Levi became conscious of what was going on, and when he realized it was not the petite woman who was going to be saving his life with her kiss, whoever was bending over the captain found their neck in a tight, suffocating grip of piercing nails that drew blood. Auruo's eyes widened in shock.

Levi slowly opened his eyes with a perturbing air of languor. "Put your filthy mouth on me and I swear to Maria Wall I will rip your fucking windpipe out."

"Heichou!" Petra thoughtlessly threw herself on top of him and he grunted in discomfort, releasing Auruo. "Thank goodness you're alright."

Levi was too unsettled having his face pressed into her breasts to return her embrace. "Damn it, Woman, put your clothes on!"

~oOo~

**This was another requested Levi x Petra prompt I received. Hope you guys enjoyed.**


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